Sunsets and silhouette dreams
by DearSweetPapercut
Summary: "We should take it slow...I don't want to rush..." Sara clarified as if they were in a hotel room faced with the decision of going through with it or not.


So I thought this one- shot was going to kill me! Inspired by the song 'He can't Have you' by A Rocket to the moon.

Enjoy.

Please review!

Disclaimer: I own zilch.

**Sunsets and silhouette dreams**

The sun had bowed making way for the night, the sky painted in the pastel colours of dusk. Nothing surrounded them but vast amounts of barren landscape, the desert reaching out towards the horizon. Greg cracked the window as cigarette smoke engulfed the car alongside the summer heat.

"I thought things would be different..." Sara announced in a low voice taking a drag of her cigarette, her eyes brimming with tears as she watched the skies.

Greg turned to study her- his gaze dancing across her skin like rain. She had barely changed since they'd first met. Her smile lines had become more defined over the years but that only seemed to make her more beautiful to him.

"I thought that perhaps things would work out...that we'd be together... that we would be happy..." She continued talking but it was as if she was talking to herself rather than him, voicing the opinions of her husband that she had been keeping bottled up inside.

Greg could sense her pain, the uneasiness that had consumed her being as she fought against the tears threatening to fall. He wanted to do something to take that feeling away- to make her happy like she deserved to be. But as the gold of her wedding band glinted it became known to him that it would be wrong for him to promise her that he would love her no matter what. That he wanted to spend the rest of his life making her content.

"He doesn't love me anymore but he just can't bring himself to say it..." She confessed finally turning to him. The broken look in her eyes physically hurting Greg more than he imagined it would.

"I love you" It was the first honest thing he said all night. He tangled his fingers with hers, warming her shaky hand. Sara simply just nodded her body burning against his touch.

She wanted to say something but all of the words were caught up in her chest her heart beating rapidly against her ribcage. She took the final drag of her cigarette flicking the butt out of the window before looking at him once again with a critical eye.

"...I love you too" She mumbled her eyes lowered out of indignation.

Silence consumed them the hot, thick air stilling as the feeling of consistency came crashing down upon them.

"...Why does it feel so wrong?" Sara asked him honestly.

"We're not doing anything...it shouldn't do..." He shrugged voicing his logic. Sara ran her tongue over her lover lip moisten it attempting to make the words less like sandpaper on her tongue.

"But I want to..." She declared looking at him once again as if to assay her honesty. "...I want you to make love to me"

Greg watched her carefully studying her expression with doubt. "I want to..." He agreed eventually.

"We should..." Sara proclaimed attempting to sound sure of herself. "...I'll book us a hotel room" Greg remained silent, watching Sara as she made herself comfortable with the idea of adultery.

"...And we can do it" She added as if the sex was an afterthought. "We can...have sex"

"If that's what you want..." Greg nodded.

"We should take it slow...I don't want to rush..." Sara clarified as if they were in a hotel room faced with the decision of going through with it or not.

"We can take it at whatever pace you feel comfortable with..." Greg replied softly realising that all of these words, all of these thoughts were never to be real.

"I'll lingerie...if you want..." Sara attempted to study his response, gauging his reaction to the idea. "...Grissom never cared for it...But if you'd like me to wear it..."

"You'd look beautiful to me no matter what you wore..." He simply stated.

"Black lace... something simple" Sara decided almost ignoring him as he spoke. "I'd ask you if you loved me... I don't want to do this if you don't"

"I love you more than you can imagine..." Greg let the walls he'd build around his heart slip, giving in to the fantasies running through Sara's mind.

"I'll tell you kiss me..." Sara took a sharp intake of breath. "...I've wanted to ask you so many times"

"I've always wanted to kiss you..." he almost whispered to her.

"I'd be so nervous..." Her shaky breath seemed to reinforce that. "I never thought I'd cheat on my husband...But I want you..."

"Are you sure...you want to do this?" Greg asked.

"Yes...I've been thinking about it so much...I just...need...to do it" A scarlet blush crept onto her cheeks as she realised just how honest she had been by saying that. "Can I undress myself?" Greg looked at her questioningly. "I...I'm worried of what you'll think of me. Of what I look like...underneath all of this..."

"Sure..." He nodded, a small sense of resentment towards Grissom appearing in his mind- Sara was beautiful but from the nervousness with she spoke it was as if she hadn't realised.

"I'll wear that shirt you like...the red one...with the shiny buttons..." She paused pulling another cigarette from the box in her lap. "The buttons always get stuck...They are really small. When I take it off...can you promise you won't stare at the scar above my hip?"

"I promise"

"Once we're undressed...I guess we should...start..." Sara shrugged her shoulders. "I'll pull your hand to my body... I want you touch me...Grissom never caresses my breasts...He's always... rushing to finish... We're apart so much... It just... It's always so quick..."

"We don't have to rush...We can take as long as we want..." Greg pointed out watching as she blew a puff of smoke against the windshield.

"Your tongue could drive me wild" She was almost whispering scared about sharing the things she'd thought about. "He...never does..."

Greg shifted in his seat as he tried to stop the physical reaction he was having to her words, his heart thudding irregularly.

"I'd like to put my hands on you, to feel you in my hands."

"Sara...this is too much...I can't...listen...to this" Greg rubbed his eyes, his body shivering as he tried to push the images she had planted out of his mind.

"If I stop...it's going to stay in my head...it's going to be there at the back of my mind. Every time, I look at you, think about you... I'll be thinking about... what it would be like... I need to do this..." She was pleading with him to listen but Greg felt his head spin.

"It's not going to stop- even if you tell me now. Those thought's... they're not going to go away... because we want this... both of us... want to be together... "

"I can't. I can't do that." Sara shook her head looking away from him out of shame.

"It's not just about the sex Sara. If you're not ready for that I'm not going to pressure you..." His voice softened.

"But if we're talking... we're not doing anything..." Sara finally said. "...It's not wrong."

**The End **


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